ideas // thoughts // notes

Hello Again, Doctor


I originally sent this to friends, families and supporters subscribed to our email list. But I decided to post it publicly in hopes that others might be encouraged if they happen to be in a similar situation. It's a post that I hated writing and sending/publishing because there isn't an ending. But, as I've learned recently, some aspects or parts of our stories may never find an ending as soon as we hope or on this side of eternity.  

On Thursday, I see Dr. Kalantar again. Even typing that, I get a little emotional. As many of you already know, I've been dealing with severe back issues since May and despite medications, physical therapy and improving my posture - I've seen very little overall improvement. Something that was expected to go away in a matter of weeks has, like an awkward neighbor, stayed around longer than anticipated. 

I'd like to say I'm not discouraged, but that wouldn't be the entire truth. I'm finding ways to cope with the pain, fatigue and inconvenience of a health issue such as this. My family, our staff team and students have been very encouraging - offering their help, prayers and being the listening ear that I've needed as I try to process all of this. 

I'm grateful that, through Hannah's job, I have access to some of the best healthcare in the country. It is truly a blessing! On Thursday, I return to Dr. Kalantar's office. He's my spinal surgeon/doctor and I've only met with him once before. At this point, I'm praying for some answers and a new direction that could help me put this thing behind me. 

As I weigh my options, I am extremely nervous that I'll make the wrong choice - so my request is that you pray that Hannah and I have discernment, courage and patience as it seems like this thing is far from over. I know that God isn't done writing my story and whether or not this is a continual issue doesn't diminish my love for Him or my understanding that He cares for me.